You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
