I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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