Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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