We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Ambien. No doubt about it.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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