But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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