OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He did a backflip because drugs
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