It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
