it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
