She said her name was "party"
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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