Apparently you make a good broom.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
