Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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