somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I puked a lego.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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