Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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