it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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