and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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