Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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