if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Your penis caused this!
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