Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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