redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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