Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
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