You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
