yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
