I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
