on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize