That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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