I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
