I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
You don't make any sense
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