its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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