she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
