so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
