I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
