youre lurking in front of me
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Even my vagina gasped.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize