why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize
