So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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