He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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