Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I need to sanitize my soul.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
