how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize