In the future we'll all be gay
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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