So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize