there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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