Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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