dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
