There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Randomize
