So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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