i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize