Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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