Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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