I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
