Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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