Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
