People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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